The Kiwi Conspiracy

I was getting dressed for work this morning...tying my shoes when, "SNAP!" my shoelace breaks. I was already ready to walk out the door - except for my shoes. No way I'm changing pants and my shirt to match a different pair of dress shoes - not at this point.

I did what any reasonable man would do and re-fit the laces so they could still tie a bow knot and went to work. I planned on getting new laces on my lunch break.

At lunch, I went to Target to buy the laces. They were easily found and just $1.79. Fair price...or so I thought.

I don't know if you have bought shoelaces recently, but I have, and done it twice. I've become aware this is the biggest ripoff in free-market capitalism. I don't know of any other company that makes shoelaces. Kiwi is your only choice. They have monopolized shoelaces. What kind of sick bastards set out to monopolize shoelaces?

Anyway, back to the story...

And what do you get for your $1.79? Two pairs of laces. Now I like a good bargain and getting two-for-one is usually a good deal. But just how often do shoelaces break? Really? I will have long grown tired of seeing a spare pair of brown dress laces cluttering my clutter drawer to wait for them to become useful again. They will be thrown out after 8-12 months of non-use. And I'll forget I even had a spare pair at the time when I need them again.

So essentially I pay double what I need to pay.

And it's not as if there is any reasonable explanation to pack 4 brown dress laces in one package is there? Say I had a shoelace fetish and wanted two pair. If they were packaged at 1-pair per pack, couldn't I buy two packs? For the common sense man who wants just one pair of laces - he's out of luck.

This is just another example of how the corporate big shots stick it to the workin' man. Shame on you Kiwi. Shame on you.